Parental Guidance: Parenting Tips

The new normal

Posted from sweet juniper! 10 hours ago
Parental Guidance : Family Journals

Three months ago my wife went back to work and I was left all alone with the two kids. At first I felt overwhelmed and certain I wouldn't last more than a couple weeks. But now, whatever: it's the new normal. A lot of people consider the idea of staying home with a preschooler and an infant terribly... (original story)

About kindergarten.

Posted from finslippy 1 day 4 minutes ago
Parental Guidance : Family Journals

So Henry starts kindergarten next week. Kindergarten around these parts--did I mention?--is a half-day affair. Half day. As in not a full day. The program was supposed to be changed to a full day, but then at the last minute it wasn't, just like that. We could discuss the pedagogical arguments behin... (original story)

Posted from sweet juniper! 1 day 4 hours ago
Parental Guidance : Family Journals

When my wife gets home from work, I see the basement suddenly with her eyes. It looks the third story of a tiny Hong Kong alleyway, with crisscrossing clotheslines filled with drying clothes. "I don't need to guess what you guys did today." "We tie-dyed, mama!" the kid says from somewhere inside t... (original story)

Remember when we were innocent? Before our kids found love with Nintendo?

Posted from The Mommy Blog 1 day 16 hours ago
Parental Guidance : Family Journals

Yesterday, at the meet-n-greet coffee klatch at the kids’ school, we all rustled around grabbing coffee and donut holes (the younger siblings were all, “DONUT HOLES!” I think I actually taught one little boy a new word. His mom glared at me). My ex still had my camera, so I was ... (original story)

Oh, dear

Posted from The Mommy Blog 1 day 19 hours ago
Parental Guidance : Family Journals

My ex’s AARP card just arrived in the mail. (original story)

The Annual Back to School Photo: Impatience with a Side of Insouciance

Posted from The Mommy Blog 1 day 20 hours ago
Parental Guidance : Family Journals

They’re back. And Daphne insisted there be one of me, after a late-night school supply run. (original story)

Dear neighbors.

Posted from finslippy 3 days ago
Parental Guidance : Family Journals

Today on the way home from the playground we ran into Brian, aka Looky Daddy, and his clan. Henry had his t-shirt hiked up so that the headhole was circling his face. He asked Sharon, aka Mrs. Looky Daddy (I think she's going to pummel me for calling her that, but oh well) if he looked cool, and she... (original story)

Don’t worry, I haven’t died or anything

Posted from The Mommy Blog 3 days ago
Parental Guidance : Family Journals

I’ve just been up to my patootie in school, home, and crazy person related affairs. The kids go back Monday, and I’m actually a little sad about it (I must have remembered to take my meds today). This is the first year they will all be in class for the same time span, and that I can a... (original story)

You can make a car out of wood. . .

Posted from sweet juniper! 4 days ago
Parental Guidance : Family Journals

Today is our fifth anniversary; I spent all week and a trip to Hollander's under the delusion that the fifth was the paper anniversary. I discovered it was "wooden" too late to get any whittlin' done. But miraculously I am all showered, with aftershave and cologne. And in spite of a recent bout of A... (original story)

Urban Apple Pickin'

Posted from sweet juniper! 5 days ago
Parental Guidance : Family Journals

You've got a daughter who loves apples. You should be coming up on the greatest time of the year: u-pick season. But with gas prices being what they are and none of the orchards yet advertising ripe honeycrisps---the black-tar heroin of the pomaceous fruit world---you're pretty much left with last y... (original story)

I’m soo tired (HOW TIRED ARE YOU?)

Posted from The Mommy Blog 6 days ago
Parental Guidance : Family Journals

I just pulled out my checkbook to pay the cleaning service (praise be to God), flipped it over to start writing, and realized that it was, in fact, the remote for the DVD player. I thankyew. (original story)

My Ex is throwing me an engagement party. For real.

Posted from The Mommy Blog 6 days ago
Parental Guidance : Family Journals

I mean, does it get any better than this? My ex-husband is so excited about my engagement to someone he admires that he is throwing me a get-together and inviting my parents while his parents are in town. Sha-ZAM! If that’s not divorcing with Tenderness and Grace, I don’t know what is.... (original story)

And now an important lesson from our collection of terrifying Nixon-era children's books

Posted from sweet juniper! 6 days ago
Parental Guidance : Family Journals

Sometimes I yearn for the past, back before children's books about handicaps were all politically correct namby-pamby BS about how everyone is the same even if they look a little different. Back in the day, you could buy a book about a boy who's dad has had just about enough of him sticking his hand... (original story)

Business time.

Posted from finslippy 6 days ago
Parental Guidance : Family Journals

So I'm in this book, The Best Creative Nonfiction, Vol. 2. For reasons beyond my understanding, the editors asked if they could use one of my posts; needless to say I agreed. I've added a link over to the right, as well as the one above. I'm a little embarrassed to have my blog post, which probably ... (original story)

Think I’m twisted? My ex is the double-helix of evil.

Posted from The Mommy Blog 7 days ago
Parental Guidance : Family Journals

Just look at this email he sent tonight, knowing full well what I’ve been through.By the way, those pesky maggots came back again and we uh well there wasn’t any food in the fridge and uh well we uh… (original story)